Contentment

At first I thought perhaps the title should read "Contentment, No Small Thing" but that wouldn't really work in a blog about "Small Things". So I reconsidered contentment. It is after all not a measurable thing in terms of matter. It is a concept, an idea, a way of thinking and being. It is a huge accomplishment for the psyche yet it cannot be weighed. It seems a difficult thing to find in this place and time I find myself in today.

It is always today.

I wonder about the brain and contentment. If a contented state of being is a discipline that is accomplished through practice and attention...then perhaps there is a brain state that has to be subdued in order to achieve this kind of peace with everything. The definition of this word varies from source to source. Webster says it is "freedom from worry or restlessness: peaceful satisfaction". The Oxford dictionary defines it as "a state of happiness and satisfaction". The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia desdribes it thus "To be free from care because of satisfaction with what is already one's own".

Given everything I have learned about human psychology, we have a built in component for dissatisfaction. We drive and strive. We learn to be always on the ready for the inevitability of change. This biological and psychological mandate certainly makes "Conentment" a very difficult thing to acquire. The desire for MORE.... has always threatened our world with its insatiablility. Now more than ever. It would seem some have great difficulty being content ... even with more than enough.

Why is this small thing, this simple peaceful untouchable thing so difficult to achieve?

People who possess contentment do have an aura of serenity about them. They are settled in their hearts and minds. They smile easier. They rest better. The little twin demons of worry and anxiety seem to be unable to vex the contented soul. I know some lovely humans who I believe have achieved contentment. Most are older than me. They have roots, they have routines, they have peace with their lives. They aren't looking for the next thing, they aren't seeking change. Instead they simply paddle quietly along in life, going with the ebb and flow, accepting all things.

I seek this small thing. I have possessed it for short periods of time... but that retlessness always seems to surface sooner or later and I am on to seeking the next great adventure. Or some great upheaval comes along and I succumb to fear and worry, trapped by the way of things in the world, desparate to escape somehow.

I sit now at the almost end of winter... gazing out at the ducks and geese and coots floating by on the Pend Oreille. The red winged blackbirds are singing as they mob the birdfeeder. The cottonwoods are budding. This is a most pleasant time of year... a most beautiful time of year here on the river. In my heart I want to embrace this place and settle in it. Still in spite of a desire to finally be "here" .... I consider yet another move. Will I ever be in one place long enough to shine forth that aura of contented peace?

Will I find a place that feels like home?

Will I find contentment?

"Now there is great gain in Godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world and we can take nothing out of the world" 1 Timothy 6:6-8